Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Keal Family Letter, March 2006

Hello Friends and Family. Welcome to our (late) newsletter. I've
been thinking a lot recently about attitudes. I'm actually planning on
writing a book eventually about spiritual attitudes; the spiritual
orientation of the mind. I like to think of myself as having a "glass
if half full" kind of attitude about life. I can't claim to always
have that attitude, but I strive towards it. It's one of my ideals.
Well, this past month has certainly been a test of that attitude in me.
If I didn't have a strong faith in God, this past month would have
been a test of my faith as well, but fortunately I know that the Lord
only allows evil when some good can come out of it. So our real test
is to try to see the good that came out of this past month for us.

So, what happened in the Keal family this past month? I'll start with
all the bad news, and get it off my chest. I'm just going to out-right
complain. Then I'll end with the good news, count my blessings, and
add my take on the "glass if half full" aspects of what was a truly
miserable month for us. (Speaking of writing a book... this email IS
one.)

It all started with Thea getting an ear infection the last week of
January and into the first week of February. She had a fever and an
earache for about a week. Fortunately it cleared up in time for her
birthday party on Saturday the 4th. Needless to say, we all lost a lot
of sleep that week. Sunday was the Super Bowl, and Cirdan came down
with a fever Sunday night. He then had a fever all week, which didn't
get better like Thea's did, it just got worse. Needless to say we all
lost a lot of sleep that week too. We found out later that he must
have had an ear infection too, but he never gave us any signs that his
ear hurt. On Friday morning, we woke up and his left ear was sticking
out perpendicular to the side of his head. So we headed off for the
Emergency Room. This was to be the first ER trip of three for the
month!

In the ER they informed us that Cirdan had what was called Mastoiditis.
Mastoiditis is when an ear infection spreads to the Mastoid bone just
behind the ear. The Mastoid bone is somewhat hollow, so it can easily
fill with puss and develop an infection. The problem with this is that
it's getting really close to the brain. It's a semi-serious condition,
and if it's not halted by antibiotics, it can lead to the need for
surgery, and/or nasty things like Meningitis. So the doctors told as
that we were looking at a minimum of four days in the hospital with
Cirdan.

Cirdan already felt miserable. But now those nasty old doctors decided
to stick a needle into his arm. How do you tell a 1 and 1/2 year old
boy that these people stabbing you are really trying to help you? It
was a very sad day for all of us. The doctors also needed to take a
Cat-Scan to determine how serious his condition was. You may know that
you have to hold absolutely still for a Cat-Scan. Once again try
telling that to a 1 and 1/2 year old boy with a needle stuck in his arm
and a sore ear. "It's O.K. Cirdan, the doctors are strapping you into
this huge torture machine because they want to help you." "Yeah
right!" he's thinking, "I"m not dumb, these people poked in my sore
ear, and stuck a needle in my arm. Nothing good can come out of this
Papa!" Interestingly, what Cirdan went through is an amazing
analogy for what we adults go through when bad things happen in our
lives. Just as Tirah and I were trying to reassure Cirdan that this
scary hospital was ultimately going to help him, the Lord has just as
much trouble trying to comfort us when bad things happen to us. We're
like children in the Lord's eyes. We can't see the big picture like He
can. He knows that a certain bad thing is just temporary compared to
the long term benefit, but we don't know that, and so we struggle with
things like faith and attitudes. This month has been like a needle
stuck in our arm. Right now, all we feel is the pain. We hope and
pray that we'll be able to see the "medicine" being delivered through
that "needle."

Cirdan developed quite the fear of the "People in the White Coats" over
the course of our stay. We had some very nice nurses taking care of
us, but it didn't matter how nice they were to Cirdan because they were
wearing white coats, and that meant bad things. So, we spent 4 days
and 3 nights in the pediatrics ward of the hospital, Friday the 10th
through Monday the 13th. On Monday we were discharged. Tirah
meanwhile was using up her valuable paid-time-off.

Late Monday afternoon we all arrived home. Cirdan was so happy to be
unplugged from the IV, and able to run around. His swollen ear was
mostly back to normal, and he felt much better. Tirah on the other
hand, had picked up some sort of bug in the hospital. Earlier on
Monday morning, before we left, she threw up in the hospital. Cirdan
actually had thrown up too, and we guess that he got the same thing we
had, but his antibiotic probably knocked it out sooner. When we got
home from the hospital, Tirah crashed in bed, while I put the kids to
bed. Half-way through putting the kids to bed, I started getting a
stomach ache too. By 8:30 that night I was throwing up, and had lost
control of my bodily functions. I had never felt such abdominal pain
in my life. Later that night Tirah called the ambulance for me, and
the same day we left the hospital, we were heading back into it. Only
this time it was a different hospital, because the one we had been in
before was closed. (We found out later that that hospital had an
epidemic outbreak of this G.I. bug)

Once in the hospital we waited forever. At least it felt like that.
Being abdominal pain, the doctors had to have my symptoms active in
order to diagnose it, before they could give me pain killers. Finally
they did, and I was able to sleep. While we were there, Tirah admitted
herself too. So Tirah and I spent the early morning of Valentine's Day
side by side on hospital beds. We were discharged by about 7:00 in
the morning on Tuesday. The doctors never really said what it was,
other than that there was a really nasty G.I. (Gastro-Intestinal) bug
going around. I don't think at that point that they knew just how
nasty it was.

I think it was by the end of Tuesday that Thea, my Mom, and my Dad all
came down with it as well. For some reason I got the worst of it
though. I guess I just have a weaker constitution for that sort of
thing. So we were all pretty sick for the week of the 13th through
the 17th. Needless to say, we didn't get much sleep that week. Tirah
felt the least sick of all of us, so she got the hard job of taking
care of all of us. Meanwhile using up even more of her paid time off.
Time-off that we were hoping to spend on vacation time.

Fortunately I felt better by Sunday the 19th, and was able to play for
the Bryn Athyn Marriage Conference Dinner. Unfortunately we were
unable to attend the Conference because we were all sick, and we had to
be giving Cirdan his antibiotic all week (which was not that much fun
either). We were pretty upset about missing the Conference. We had
really been looking forward to it.

So I came home Sunday night after playing for the Dinner, to find Tirah
in a lot of pain from a bad earache. It was her birthday. That week
her ear got better and worse and better and worse. On Wednesday the
22nd, we all went into the doctor's office. Cirdan had to have a
follow-up check-up, and Tirah got her ear looked at. The doctor said
that Cirdan looked fine, but Tirah had an antibiotic prescribed for
her. She didn't get it filled right away because she wanted to see if
Homeopathy would heal it.

Cirdan was now done taking his antibiotic. But he then developed a
rash over his whole body. Meanwhile Thea developed a bloated or
distended stomach. So we went back into the doctor's office. The
doctor said that Cirdan's rash was very likely a reaction to the
antibiotic, and he said that Thea's tummy was very possibly her
reaction to the G.I. bug that we all had. Cirdan's rash eventually
cleared up, but he still has a pretty nasty diaper rash, probably a
combination of the antibiotic and the diarrhea. Thea's distended
tummy comes and goes, along with gas and occasional diarrhea.
Needless to say, we didn't get much sleep that week.

But then, Tirah's ear infection got much worse. It started to become
unbearable pain. On Sunday the 26th we filled her perscription. But
the pain kept getting worse. On Monday night (early Tuesday morning)
we drove into the Emergency Room for the third, and hopefully final,
time. This time we waited for almost an hour before getting a pain
killer for her. By the beginning of March she was feeling mostly back
to normal.

The first few days of March we began to think that maybe it was all
over. But then, on Friday night, Cirdan came down with a fever.
Saturday morning we took him into the doctor. His ear infection was
back. So he was going to be back on antibiotics for 5 days. But then
Cirdan's rash came back, and this time it was worse. Then he had a
lethargic episode in the morning on Monday, so we took him into the
doctor AGAIN. This time, they said, "Well he seems to be reacting to
this antibiotic too. We're sort of running out of options here, but
here's another drug to try. I can't promise that he won't react to
this one too." Well, at this point we were fed up. We didn't get
that perscription filled. We decided to get a second opinion.
Tirah's ear infection is still not better yet either. So this Friday,
Tirah and Cirdan have an appointment with Mitch Shapiro, a Homeopath
down near Philadelphia. Hopefully that will help to get us all
healthy again. So far, I'm the only one in my family who hasn't had
an ear infection. I guess that's the thing I have a stronger
constitution for. So the story is still unfinished. We're hoping
that we're nearing the finish line of renewed health.

And if all that wasn't enough, February was the month that we had to
renew both of our driver's licenses (go in and get our photos taken),
and we had to get the oil changed in our car. Not normally distressing
chores, but for this month they were just one more thing. Oh, and the
CD burner in my computer died.

Alright alright... enough complaining! If you've gotten this far in
the email, here's where it gets happier. It's times like these when I
really see the value of being able to live in the present. If I think
too much about the past, I start to feel really sorry for myself. If I
think too much about the future (more sickness? eternal financial
debt?) I worry too much. The present is the only time I can truly
function in, so my prayer is: "Lord, give us this day our daily bread."

So now, let me count my blessings over this past month: Thea was well
for her 3rd birthday! And it was a really fun party, with lots of
family and friends there. I'm thankful that we got to be healthy for
that.

I had to miss most of the Super Bowl, but I managed to see the final
quarter... and the Steelers won! Woohoo! (I'm a huge Steelers fan,
in case you didn't know.)

While, in the hospital, whenever Cirdan managed to fall asleep, Tirah
and I got to watch some of the Winter Olympics in Italy. Something we
wouldn't have been able to do, since we don't have TV at home. That
was fun.

My sister, Tamar, had her second child in, while we were in the
hospital with Cirdan. And though we still haven't been able to see him
(for fear of getting him sick), it's a wonderful event, and we can be
thankful that so far he has not gotten sick. With the birth of
Tamar's second son, we now have an interesting situation in my family:
Thea is the only granddaughter on the Keal side of the family, and
Cirdan is the only grandson on the Echols side of the family. Both my
sisters have two boys. And Steve and Galadriel have two girls. We'll
have to see if Eli and Nicola's baby breaks the pattern, but for now,
Thea remains the favorite granddaughter on the Keal side, and Cirdan
remains the favorite grandson on the Echols side.

Funny story: I was telling Thea that her Aunt Tamar had a new baby; a
concept that she got without too much effort. I then went off on a
long-winded explanation about where babies come from, in which I tried
to appeal to Thea's amazing understanding and comprehension, while
still being appropriate for a 3 year old. Obviously I failed because
when I was done, Thea paused for a second and then said, "Papa, I don't
know what you are talking about."

By the way, Thea is telling everyone that we've all had "Ear
Connections" and that's why we've been sick.

We are very thankful that Tirah has now qualified for paid-time-off in
her job at Jo-Ann Fabrics. If she didn't have that, either Tirah would
have just had to work straight through all of this craziness, or we
would have gone even further into debt. But she was able to take
several days off, and yet still be paid. A huge blessing.

We are very grateful to be able to share a household with my parents.
Having them in the same house through all of this has meant that we
could leave Thea at home while we were in the hospital with Cirdan.
It has meant that we had family babysitters at critical times. When I
took Tirah to the ER in the wee hours of the morning, we were able to
just leave our kids asleep, and just move the baby monitor down the
hall. And we've had family close by, just for the sake of comfort. A
shared household is not always an easy thing, but it's very easy to
take for granted it's benefits.

Living in Kempton is also not always an easy thing, but it does have a
wonderful support network when people need it. We actually had meals
brought to us for a few days. We had people offer to babysit when Mom
and Dad couldn't. We've had someone offer to help us financially when
the bills start rolling in. And we've had many phone messages
expressing love and commiseration.

In between sicknesses, I actually got a chance to have a few business
meetings this month. So my music business hasn't been left completely
behind. Advent sales are still rolling in, which is nice. I also got
the chance, here and there, over the course of the month to give my
website a face-lift. Go and check it out, it looks much cooler now,
and is much more user-friendly. (http://www.solomonkeal.com)

We are incredibly grateful that things haven't been worse. When we
were in the hospital with Cirdan, everybody else in the pediatrics ward
was in much worse shape than Cirdan, and they were looking at weeks,
not days, in the hospital. We are very thankful that things weren't
worse. We're grateful that he didn't require surgery. A month like
this really made us realize how fragile human health is, and how
blessed we were for so long with wonderful health. Maybe now we won't
take it for granted so much.

We are very grateful to have Mom Echols for all her tireless efforts in
finding the right Homeopathic remedies to keep us even more healthy,
and for sending them to us when we didn't have them, and for being by
our side in the wee hours of the night, even if it was just on the
phone.

We've learned how to be better about "rolling with the punches," and
"taking things in stride." We've had many blessings in our lives, and
we were in the habit of thanking the Lord daily for those blessings.
It's a wonderful spiritual challenge to continue to thank the Lord for
blessings, even when they're harder to see. It's a good exercise for
building up the strength of one's character and attitude. And it's
amazing how it really does come down to a choice. We humans are
nothing but choice. That is what determines who we are. I can choose
to feel victimized or sorry for myself, or I can choose to learn from a
situation and count my blessings. It can be very hard to FEEL
grateful and blessed when your family is in so much pain. But
fortunately we can CHOOSE to stay positive and eventually LEARN how to
feel blessed even in difficult times.

So that's the story from the front lines of the Keal household. We
hope that all of you are doing well, and may you feel the Lord's
blessings showering down upon you.

Spring is coming!

Love,
Solomon - Papa, Husband
Tirah - Mama, Wife
Thea - Daughter, Sister
Cirdan - Son, Brother

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